It's go go go for working mums in the Events business.
Have you heard those single gals in the office moaning about their busy week? Leg wax Tuesday, hair cut Thursday, shopping all day Saturday for a new outfit to wear to a party on Saturday night. And then brunch on Sunday. “And then maybe, just maybe I might get some time to myself. I’m just so tired.”
Working mums who hear this kind of scenario are torn between throttling the poor girl for being such a drama queen and chuckling to themselves. “You don’t know what busy is you selfish little imp!” And they don’t. Being a mum is tough at the best of times. Being a mum and working in one of the busiest industries on the planet is nothing short of diabolical.
Their work doesn’t stop when they leave the office, and it doesn’t start when they arrive promptly in the morning. (And being prompt is simply what mums have to do… just ask any mum with a child in school or daycare). Their day began hours before the office princess took a leisurely shower that lasted long enough for the hot water to run out and sat down to a breakfast of exotic fruits and muffins. They were up at six – at the latest – searching for missing school socks, packing lunches, looking for loose change for lunch orders, in-between trying to make little people get a wriggle on and eat something with at least one of the five essential food groups in it.
By 8am the front door is being slammed shut just before the working mum realises too late the car keys are still inside. If they’re lucky, husband or partner is still backing out of the driveway and can open the door. If not, then they’ll have to ask the neighbour to climb through the window. Again! By 8.30am the kids are dropped off, hopefully at the right place and hopefully reasonably happy, and the working mum can relax for the first time in two-and-a-half hours. If they drive to work they might be listening to the radio, and chuckle along at the banter of the jocks. Still, they are always thinking.
Thinking, thinking, thinking ahead – about their day, about dinner that night, and about what costume they’re going to throw together for their eldest child’s school book parade the next day. They spoil themselves in the little coffee shop downstairs with a skim milk latte – no sugar because the latest issue of NW magazine says that sugar is the primary cause of cellulite – and walk into the office, cheery and seemingly without a care in the world. Another working mum – a sister at arms – points out some vegemite on their shirt which they sponge before the first meeting of the day.
Back at their desk an hour later 52 emails need urgent attention, the school principal’s left a message, and they have a sudden pang of guilt about how they’ll be away for the youngest one’s birthday because a big client NEEDS them at an event. Welcome to the domain of the so-called liberated 21st Century woman. So what is it like? Read the following pages to find out...
Q: Why do you work?
I want to continue to be challenged. I thrive on the excitement and variety that work offers and the opportunity to meet and work with a wide range of people.
Q: What is it like being a working mum in the business events industry?
It’s a great job, although it can be hectic – being organised is essential. Advanced planning and good routines make it a lot easier.
Q: What is the hardest part?
Being continually torn between wanting to be at work and enjoying my career, equally as much as wanting to be with Ella. Taking an active role during school to turn up to take part is an added demand. Participating in school activities is great in theory but I find managing to get there is often the difficulty.
Q: How do you keep your sanity?
I have learnt to accept that things may not be perfect and discovered somewhat belatedly, knowing what I can and can’t do. I’ve learnt to let Ella help, and I also get someone to help with the housework and the garden, which gives me a few hours to do something else. Flexibility and creativity also help getting through things – and a good sense of humour!
Q: What support does your family offer?
My family’s support has made all the difference in my professional success and having a network of friends that can pitch in when there is a crisis. Thank goodness for my mother– she runs Ella to swimming, touch rugby and violin, and makes sure the homework is done. There is no way I could manage without her.
Q: Do you have any time for yourself?
Impossible as this may seem – yes. I keep one room childfree, and take 20 minutes at night before I go to bed to read a magazine (and I make sure that it is not a work related one!), or listen to some music.
Q: If you could change one thing what would it be?
The date of our industry tradeshow – it is the same date as Ella’s birthday.
Q: What would you like to say to employers of working mums?
I think you must be your own advocate. Many of us simply don’t ask for what we want out of shyness or fear of not getting what we want or out of a sense of duty to blindly serve. Know what you want, figure out how to make it work and ask.
Q: What does your company do to assist you and other working mums?
Venture Southland works with its employees in terms of what works best for each individual, which helps address our work/life balance needs. The advances in telecommunications technology, and strategies such as flexi-time and a compressed working week are widely used to help us balance work and family.
Q: Why do you work?
For financial reasons.
Q: What is it like being a working mum in the business events industry?
I love the interaction with our corporate clients, the excitement of travel, and the creativity of the people who we work with, from theming, actors, entertainment, venues, food and exceptional service throughout the world. The industry is constantly growing and changing.
Q: What is the hardest part?
The effort to balance time with work and family. I need to switch off on the drive home from the office and be ready to deal with the demands of children, homework, pets and running a household. Sometimes that just doesn’t happen easily. And also the drive to work in the morning when it’s been particularly difficult to find the swimming goggles, the missing homework and put two little girls’ hair in pigtail plaits.
Q: How do you keep your sanity?
Mostly I don’t! But at EMC, we work closely as a team to put together incentives, and that is challenging and refreshing. We do have fun together, both at work and at home. I think that is the key. Family is my priority, and we like to go for bike rides, the beach, play at the park, all the normal stuff where you can laugh and joke around. The most important time is for Phil and I to regularly have time out together, an uninterrupted meal, weekend away, coffee with friends, or chill out at the movies.
Q: What support does your husband offer?
He is amazing! He does after-school pick-ups, cooking dinner and cleaning up too. He gets them to help build things, like in the Christmas holidays there was an article in the Parents Inc magazine on how to build a billy cart/trolley. So off they went and bought the timber, found some wheels and then a lot of sawing, hammering and drilling and it’s done! They spent hours riding it up and down the driveway. The girls just love making things with him. He can work flexible hours, so between us we juggle it all.
Q: Do you have any time for yourself?
Not really.
Q: If you could change one thing what would it be?
Some space to unwind. Sheryl Savill Hunter/Gatherer The Extra Mile Company (EMC) Age of children: Sarah, nine and Katie, seven Marital status: Married to Philip for 17 years
Q: What would you like to say to employers of working mums?
Allow flexibility with working hours and school holidays, and being able to work from home in the evenings makes it all manageable.
Q: What does your company do to assist you and other working mums?
There are several other working mums with preschoolers, teenagers and older children. Some work part-time in the office, and can work from home. There is an understanding that we have a commitment to our families. We may start later in the morning sometimes but also take work home with us. The same goes for the dads in the office whose wives work. They drop their children at childcare or school.
Q: How can the government help working mums more?
The financial pressure is huge. Raising children is expensive. The new tax credits will help financially with a lot of families, and funding in schools should be reviewed, as there are a lot of expenses with uniforms, stationery, camps, the list goes on.
Q: Why do you work?
I enjoy what I do and have done so for nearly 10 years – particularly working with the CINZ team and my colleagues in the C&I industry. Not many people get the chance to promote such a beautiful country as New Zealand for a living. And of course the ‘income’ helps pay the bills.
Q: What is it like being a working mum in the business events industry?
I think most working mums would say it is a juggle, but it’s also about retaining balance. By working you keep in touch with the world outside the family and I’m fortunate because I enjoy travelling, and my trips are never more than a few days.
Q: What is the hardest part?
Trying to fit everything you need to do into a 24 hour day and meeting the sometimes conflicting needs of family and work.
Q: How do you keep your sanity?
There are times when my role is extremely busy, particularly leading up to large events, but I have a great sense of achievement once I’ve completed a project. Kids tend to put things in perspective though, despite what happens at work – once you’ve had kids you can put up with most business dramas. Weekends are spent with the family, and since we live on the beach in Manly, it’s easy to relax.
Q: What support does your husband provide?
Malcolm has designed his business to provide him with the flexibility to help me to do my job – he opened his office in Manly so he’s close to home and the daycare centre. He can share the drop-off or pick-up duties or mind the kids when I have meetings. He travels quite a bit as well and does work long hours however both of us are never away at the same time. On the odd occasion travel may overlap, one of us changes our itinerary.
Q: Why do you work?
If you were home with six young children which included threeyear- old triplets, six-year-old twins and a nine-year-old brother you’d want to get out of the house, wouldn’t you? It was 1999. I missed “work” (as if being a wife and mother of such a huge brood wasn’t enough). Calling upon my marketing background I started a company Successful Internet Strategies. My original goal was to offer marketing consultancy services. This quickly morphed into an international motivational business speaking career.
Q: What is it like being a working mum in the business events industry?
My role would be similar to many that have to travel. I find it no problem with the industry – the problem is getting good and dependable and LONG-TERM home help. Additionally, I try to bring my children (not all in one go) with me when I can so they can enjoy the good parts of the job with me.
Q: How do you keep your sanity?
Easily. I get away often. I tune out the fighting of the kids!
Q: What support does your husband offer?
I have a wonderful husband who allows me the freedom that is required to travel so much (rather than being an ‘I want you home cooking me dinner’ sort of man). Even though he has a heavy duty corporate job (CIO for the largest health authority in New Zealand) he carries more than his share.
Q: If you could change one thing what would it be?
I can’t think of anything off the bat besides trimming a couple of inches off my tush.
Q: Why do you work?
In short, my mind is too enterprising to enable me to be “unemployed”. Plus I remain the main breadwinner in my household.
Q: What is it like being a working mum in the business events industry?
My industry associates don’t often relate to my lifestyle. Most are not mothers themselves, and in many cases are unmarried. Often clients are surprised I have two children, so this is normally not a topic for discussion.
Q: What is the hardest part of it?
Managing the “guilt trip” … “Mum, when are you going to be home tonight?” … “Mum, why are you going away again!”
Q: How do you keep your sanity?
Years ago, when my girls were still babies, I came to realise after much frustration and to be honest, exhaustion and tears, that I wasn’t the superhuman I thought I could be. Today I feel I have established for myself and my family a good balance between work and home. Above my desk (next to the CCCB mission statement) is a quote: “If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very much.” Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis.
Q: If you have a husband/partner what support do they offer?
Terrence is wonderful. As a tradesman he leaves early for work, leaving me with lunches and the school drop-off, but arrives home early for the homework and cooking of the evening meal. After being married for 20 years, he has developed a tolerance of my work ethics and travel demands.
Q: Do you have any time for yourself?
I have a garden; a BIG garden which is always in need of my care. This is both my devoted hobby and therapy – my time out.
Q: If you could change one thing what would it be?
I would have started a couple of years earlier having children and not become caught up in my career efforts. I have two gorgeous girls, but I would love to have had three children – just ran out of body-clock time.
Q: What would you like to say to women working in the business events industry considering having children?
Babies are unpredictable and the ability to be flexible and meet many varied demands is really important. Children can and will fall ill just when you are about to run an event; day care facilities have rigid pick-up times – even when your client meeting is running over schedule. Therefore, if you want to have children and continue to work in the events industry, it is vital to have a reliable support network and ideally an understanding, flexible partner.
Q: What would you like to say to employers of working mums?
If you are lucky enough to have a mother on your team, don’t contribute to their “guilt-trip” when they need to leave work early or take a sick-day to mind their children – they are working harder than most in an effort to balance work and home.
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